The life of a gnome – II
by venatianwings
Summary: Summer was Alfie’s favorite time at the burrow and this year was no exception… Another sweet little lazy, summer tale featuring our favorite couple and of course, Alfie the garden gnome. Enjoy guys!


Author's Note: 'The Llife Of A Gnome' was received so well, that I thought I'd have a go with little Alfie again. So read that story first, if you haven't. For the rest of my readers, I hope you enjoy reading this as much as I did writing it!

Summary: Summer was Alfie's favorite time at the burrow and this year was no exception… Another sweet little lazy summer tale featuring our favorite couple and of course, Alfie the garden gnome. Enjoy guys!

The Life Of A Gnome – II

_By_

_Venatianwings_

The Weasley yard, on that bright September morning, was a-clutter with people, boxes, chickens and a bunch of curious garden gnomes. One particularly prim little one was perched very high (for him that is) on a withering, drooping branch of the apple tree, surveying the scene below with much evident interest. Alfie swung his twiggy legs to and fro as his little feet dangled over the heads of the fat white chickens, pecking away- apparently unfazed by the going-ons at the Burrow.

Alfie had been a lonely little fellow most of his life. When he was younger, his mother had been worried sick about him. She had fussed that her boy would drown himself in misery if he did not make a friend. Then uncle Blip showed up and decided to show him the world- make a gnome out of him. That was about twenty years ago, before uncle Blip went and got himself run over by that colossal red truck.

Things had not changed too much since then, but it was better. He had as many friends now as he had fingers- three. There was the podgy little gnome, Elmo, who lived under the hawthorn bush. Then there was that strange jittery, brown owl that kept flitting in and out of the highest window of the big house every day. The last of his comrades was the youngest Weasley boy- though Alfie hardly saw him for most of the year. He watched with big, round blue eyes, said boy presently floating a big brown box down the gravel walkway.

"Ron, have you got the broom?" called a strained, pitchy voice from the second floor window.

"Yes, Ginny. Where's Fred? The idiot's gone and hidden my chocolate frog collection!"

"Okay, I'll find him for you. Anything else?"

"Yeah, why isn't the great Harry Potter here yet?"

The young girl's cheeks grew a tint rosier. "I-I don't know. Harry said he'd make it by ten."

"Never mind, just check on mum. Dad swears he can't find her. Mum just keeps running off to hide every chance she gets. Last time she disappeared, Charlie found her crying with that crazy ghoul in the attic…" The boy was almost red in the face from yelling under the bright morning sun.

Alfie saw the girl's red hair disappear almost immediately from the window and turned his gaze back onto the boy. He was still holding up the big brown box, which was apparently forgotten. Looking up at the window with a slightly triste expression on his flushed, freckled face, the boy stood still and silent, lost in thought.

"Ron. Are you alright?" It was that girl again. The one with a lot of brown hair. Her brown eyes were filled with evident concern and they never left the boy's face as she walked up to his side and took his free arm. Sure Alfie liked her, but he couldn't say he was overjoyed about seeing her at the burrow. Especially with that _monster_ of a cat she had brought along.

She seemed to live here ever since that night, a week ago. That crazy night, when they had put lights in all the bushes and nearly burnt poor Elmo to death. Alfie and the rest of the gnomes had sought shelter in the willow tree by the duck pond. They had watched a huge crowd of wild people tramp all over the yard and wondered if the world was coming to an end. It was thundering so- the noise they made.

His friend, the Weasley boy, was standing in the middle of it all, alongside that girl with lots of hair. Only, she didn't seem to have had much hair that night. He couldn't really see beneath the layers of all that white cloudy stuff she had on her head. He thought she looked ridiculously like one of the fat white Weasley chickens- sashaying around in all her glittery, white, wispy glory. The gnomes had voiced a collective gasp when the boy had scooped her up in his arms, as if she weighed no more than a twig, and kissed her. _Sweet apricots! That boy was strong! _

Alfie had nearly toppled off his seat into the pond when suddenly, the other gnomes had started screaming and he spied a huge bunch of white flowers heading straight through the air- right at him. His heart had nearly jumped out of his little chest. Or so he thought because it had ached so. Alfie had closed his eyes tight and thought of poor uncle Blip and how it was now his time to go… Thankfully, he had been proved wrong. He had come to know later, through Elmo, that the boy's lady friend had thrown the flowers at them blindly and it had been caught mid-air by the boy's younger sister. Not a moment too soon perhaps, because it would have, in all probability, knocked every little gnome on the willow into the water.

Alfie had dared not step down from the tree that night, terrified of being crushed to death among the countless trampling human feet. However, the same could not be said of five young rascals who managed to sneak into the fray. Those feisty little scoundrels, one of whom thought it was fun to swing through the air on a willow shoot, land splendidly in a glass of wine and nearly die after getting marvelously drunk. Another managed to scramble onto the table and stare open mouthed at the three tier white cream cake before he had been swatted away by a handbag. The remaining three were too engaged in distracting that horrible ginger cat to have done anything heroic that was worth mentioning.

Alfie thought that the confusion was in all, probably worthwhile because the gnomes had a magnificent feast the next day. Before those dreadful chickens came out, that was. They had been entirely cooped up the previous day and did not seem to have enjoyed it much. So they pecked away with a vengeance the next morning, and Alfie kept well out of their way.

The chickens were still pecking today. Alfie looked scornfully down at them before his attention was drawn to the Weasleys again.

"Well Ron, the trunks are all set." said the oldest Weasley son, "I hope you haven't forgotten anything… Hey! Well, well, well…look at what the cat dragged in… mum's here."

The plump lady with the red hair was coming down the steps, her face buried in a piece of white cloth. A woman with long silver hair had her hands about her, guiding her gently while calling out to the boy,

"Bill Weasley, I am your wife and I weel not tolerate zat you are calling me a cat!"

"Fleur, you misunderstand me completely. It's is only a phrase, darling."

"Oh. Then I forgive you, Cherie. I am sorry. By ze way, I found your mama in ze broom closet." She patted the elderly woman on the head kindly. "Ze poor thing."

"Arthur, I can't believe he's leaving…" sobbed the plump lady when she saw the tall balding man coming up the driveway toward them, "and Ginny's going to go away so soon too…"

"Oh, come now, Molly..."

While the Weasleys spoke softly among themselves, Alfie spied a tussle in the far corner of the yard- the Weasley girl was yelling hoarsely at her twin brothers while that familiar boy with the black hair and that strange butterfly on his nose held her back with both arms. The girl didn't seem to give up. She fished out a twig from her pocket, pointed it venomously at her siblings and shouted something that was drowned out with a, "Ginny, nooooo!" from the black haired boy.

Alfie saw a jet of orange light zoom toward him and before he even realized it, the spell had struck the apple tree and knocked him off his perch, onto one of the boxes. _Thump. Ouch._

"Hey, Charlie, you missed this box. Get it in the car and I think we should be ready to leave now."

"Right Bill, but there's no room in the trunk…"

Head reeling from the fall, Alfie tried to focus his eyes. A second later however, he thought that maybe he shouldn't have bothered because what he saw made him nearly pass out again. He was looking right into the big yellow eyes of that hideous ginger cat. Toppling backwards in a pitiful attempt at a hasty retreat, Alfie slipped right through the unsealed opening of the box and into pitch darkness.

A few blind, bumpy moments later, Alfie heard a deafening roar, before the box along with him inside, started to vibrate violently. Alfie squealed in fright. He scrambled blindly up the sides of the box to the crack through which he could see light trailing in. Easing himself out, he stood atop the box and looked around. His mouth dropped open in amazement as he watched the big house shrink away before his eyes. The willow and the apple tree too seemed to be shrinking…and the hawthorn bush where little Elmo lived- he could hardly see it!

A flutter of wings and a 'hoot-hoot' next to his ear caused Alfie to jump three inches in the air. It was that jittery owl. Not surprisingly, it seemed very happy to see him. Alfie looked back toward the house. It was steadily growing tinier. As it grew smaller, he felt a strange little bubble inside him grew larger and larger.

"Hoot-hoot! Hoot-hoot!" the weird owl screeched. Alfie, however, did not hear him. The house was a tiny spec in the distance now and Alfie felt his heart settle down somewhere in the region of his stomach.

"What's that owl on about? Be quiet pig!" Came the Weasley boy's voice from up front.

"Ron!" shrieked the girl with a lot of hair, "There's a gnome in the car!"

"What? Oh, so that's what's gotten pig so excited. Well, it must have sneaked into one of the boxes."

…

"Hoot-hoot."

…

"Umm, Ron? Do you think we should take it back?" The girl's voice was unsure.

"Please tell me you're joking!"

…

"Are you mad?! It's a _gnome_ 'Mione. Just toss it out the window. It'll find its way back."

The girl now gasped in utter disbelief. "Oh! You- you're _insufferable_, Ron! How could you…"

"Er- okay, all right, so what do you suggest? We keep him in our garden and let him start a family of his own? Brilliant! Hey, I think even Crookshanks would enjoy that-"

"No! I won't let you do that! Ron, do you even remember how we first got together?"

"Oh yeah! I do- it was another one of those blasted gnomes, wasn't it?"

"And to think I expected you to have grown a soft spot for them…" The girl was muttering darkly now.

"Oh, come on 'Mione, don't get mad."

"We have to get him back to where he belongs. The burrow is his home." She pleaded, "He would die of a broken heart if he were to live away from his family, Ron."

The boy's eyebrows rose a little upon hearing this. He remained silent for a minute, then sighed and said, "All right, when we get to the house, we'll tie him to pig's leg and send him back home. Happy? Though I'll have to say, mum'll think I'm playing a nasty joke on her."

"No she won't, I'll write her a note." The girl said enthusiastically, grabbing the lack-life gnome and bringing it to her lap. Alfie was too miserable to even protest. So he stayed limp in her lap, looking up morosely into the girl's big brown eyes.

The redhead boy shrugged, sparing the desolate gnome a glance. "Well, what more can I say? I wish the lucky little bugger a happy journey."

"Hoot-hoot!", screeched pig.

FIN.

A/N: If I made you smile again, don't forget to drop a line- that would make me smile too :)


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